In 2002, a British psychology professor asked people to rate thousands of jokes, in an experiment called LaughLab. The optimum length for jokes was found to be 103 words. And jokes containing ducks were found to be funnier than jokes about other animals. Logically, therefore, a 103-word joke featuring a duck would be funniest of all. Let’s find out.
Duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Got any grapes?” The bartender says, “No. This is a bar. We don’t sell grapes.” The duck leaves.
The next day, the duck’s back. “Got any grapes?” The bartender says, “I told you yesterday. We don’t sell grapes.”
The next day: “Got any grapes?” The bartender loses it, grabs the duck, and yells, “I already told you twice! Ask me again and I’ll nail your beak to the floor!”
The next day, the duck returns. “Got any nails?” The bartender sighs. “No, we don’t have any nails.” The duck says, “Good. Got any grapes?”