Ah, that little frisson of horror and shame when you accidentally type your password in the wrong field and can READ IT. Our HR software lets me request annual leave or sick leave in the years 1900 through 2100. Handy for the working time traveller. To get their license, every used-book store in NZ must stock at least one (1) copy of Muldoon’s Rise & Fall of a Young Turk. Thai restaurant playing salsa remix of Coldplay’s Clocks. Numerous people in this process could have come to their senses. Quite like Franz Ferdinand cumbia cover in Español though. As kids in St Louis, William Burroughs’s mum and T S Eliot used to walk to dance classes past Prufrock’s Furniture Store. “Whom the gods wish to destroy they first call promising.” —Cyril Connolly “Of course, you realise, Connolly, that whoever wins the war, we shall emerge a second-rate nation.” —Orwell (Eric Blair), aged 11 Halloween costume I’d like to see: 6 five-year-olds dressed as jawas, one with a taser. Trick or treat! Historic Moments in Knitting 1: Lord Raglan orders the Earl of Cardigan’s Light Brigade charge in the Battle of Balaclava. Voting is essentially ineffectual thus irrational, so why not vote for irrational reasons? Me, I like the orange felt pens. I always wanted to read a time-travel story starring a elderly couple named Rex and Gloria Mundy. Thomas Friedman is a case study of how far you can go with a moustache and unshakeable self-confidence. The disco scenes in Scarface are so badly choreographed, they almost look real. Reading Schaller’s field observations of pandas: each day they eat for 14 hours, and poo 20 kg of semi-digested bamboo. That’s a the weight of a six-year-old. Helpful if you’re an artist who wants to sculpt an entire primary-school class in panda poo. @adzebill